Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
