I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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