it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
farters have to be the big spoon...
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize