...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
