True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
