She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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