sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
