I hate all girls vehemently.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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