Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
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