Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
