I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
zippers are such a cool invention
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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