While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Randomize
