no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
