I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize