I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
