I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
It's never too late to be topless.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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