yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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