she was so not down for the gang bang
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
