I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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