I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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