Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize