i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
