all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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