Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
The feeling are messing with the penis
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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