tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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