okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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