Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
He's a Shit stain on my heart
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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