Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
