how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
