just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize