Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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