Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
