I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
