you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
so much tequila, so little girl.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
