Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Randomize
