And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
