with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
