I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize