he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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