Porn is love you can see.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
