that's an acceptable place to lick
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
