I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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