Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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