Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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