are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize