then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
whose parrot is this?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
