she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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