is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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