So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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