sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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