Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
